How
I miss your presence every minute and how different my life is
without you in it. The little things that you did unknowingly, I'll
remember and treasure, always, fondly.
Do
you recall those taxi outings you helped organise, for all the
children with various disabilities? A young boy in a wheelchair, his
legs amputated due to meningitis? That beautiful little girl, her
stunted growth made a mockery of by her friends at school? A
brilliant day at the Yellow Crags beach, the funfair and the donkey
rides as well as the cacophony of flashing colours and sounds. The
smiles on every child's face was priceless, and you did that.
It's so empty and cold without you around, but I'll keep my feet firmly on the ground. I remember your every word of encouragement, no matter how good or bad was my temperament.
Those
long years of being abused in childhood, the isolation of not being
able to tell anyone, how could I? I didn't know it was wrong, my own
deafness and speech impediment was used against me. When the truth
finally came out, who was there for me, but you? Who held my hands,
wrapped me up in strong comforting arms as I wailed my confusion, my
anger and my lost innocence?
The memories I can recall, your laughter and tears have taken away many of my fears. You taught me all about hope, and for that, I'll somehow cope.
Reaching
adulthood, was a long and lonely path. Yes I had people around me,
but they didn't hold a candle to what you did for me. There's
something special about you, Dad, that gave me little nudges in the
right direction, even if it took a few attempts to get on the correct
course, but I finally got there.
But
what will I do without your guidance? I can't judge life with a mere
glance. You always used to sit me down and say, "It's best to go
the positive way."
So
many mistakes I've made in this life since you passed away, I've
tried so hard to overcome. The difficulties I've experienced and made
it more enjoyable and I succeeded. Now I'm the happiest I've ever
been, but it was an uphill battle to feel this way.
Since this life you had to depart, I want to let you know that deep in my heart, I will always love you, as do the rest of your family and friends too.
Writing
this down has made me realise how much I still miss you, your advice
and cuddles as well as your stern words to help put me back on track.
You were so invaluable to those around you who have benefitted from
your wisdom.
A heart-wrenchingly goodbye to the best Dad ever, I'll be proud of you forever. No-one could ask for anyone better, and I damn well say so, in this letter.
Love
you always Dad and thank you for helping shape the person I am now
xxxxx
